《40歲的美｜A Beautiful Age of 40》

Write by 張思萍

**40歲的美，

不是年齡。

是一種成熟後綻放的光。**

The beauty of 40

is not an age.

It is the light that blooms

after a long journey

back to yourself.

———

**18歲的我，

野、自由、奔放。**

她曾經以為世界會接住她，

卻被生活教會了沉默。

The 18-year-old me—

wild, free, untamed.

She once believed the world would hold her,

but life taught her silence.

———

**40歲的我，

穩、深、清晰。**

不再丟下任何版本的自己，

也不再為任何人縮小。

The 40-year-old me—

steady, deep, luminous.

She no longer abandons any version of herself,

and no longer shrinks for anyone.

———

**有 Elly + Ryan 的我，

心裡住著永恆的愛。**

不是責任、不是負擔，

是我生命中最柔軟的力量。

The mother of Elly and Ryan—

my heart carries an eternal kind of love.

Not duty, not burden,

but the softest strength in my life.

———

**不那麼瘦的我，

卻是最真實、最美、最自由的我。**

The not-so-skinny me

is the most real,

the most beautiful,

the most free version of me.

——-

**我把所有身份

所有版本、

所有黑暗、所有光亮——

全部接回來了。**

I have reclaimed every identity,

every version of myself,

every shadow,

every light.

——

**我從黑暗裡撿回自己。

不是離婚那刻，

而是我停止承擔全部世界、

開始承擔我自己那刻。**

I pulled myself out of the darkness.

Not at the moment I divorced,

but at the moment

I stopped carrying the whole world

and finally carried myself.

——-

那刻，我重生了。

That moment,

I was reborn.

——-

**我完成了自我整合。

我達到了靈魂一致。**

從前的我碎裂；

現在的我完整。

I achieved self-integration.

I reached soul alignment.

The old me lived in fragments;

the new me stands whole.

———

**我不再需要外界的認可。

因為我知道自己的價值

不再由他人定義。**

I no longer need external approval.

Because I finally know—

my worth is not defined

by anyone but me.

———

40歲的美，是什麼？

是用整個靈魂活著。

是接納全部的自己。

是被愛時不迷失，

獨處時不恐懼。

What is the beauty of 40?

It is living with the whole soul.

It is embracing every part of myself.

It is not losing myself in love,

and not fearing solitude.

———

**40歲的美，是：

我終於成為

我自己。**

The beauty of 40 is this:

I have finally

become

myself.